My Friend In Unfamiliar Territory

I miss my friend,
of past, present and future...

her advice, her humor and her contribution to conversations.
The personality that could light up a room
The stories we shared
Her enthusiasm for life
The smiles and tears
The strength she gave me with a simple look or a firm hug
I miss seeing her the way she was
Engaging, athletic, empathetic and vivacious

I miss my friend
who has a disease that stole her from all of us

leaving her to deal with the struggles of knowing but not
wanting the words but unable to find them
remembering and forgetting at the same time
the memories we will make but will promptly be eclipsed
A person who has it all but can't find the access
aiming to master the routines of life
A person bigger than life now burdened with simple needs
in a chronic state of dependence

I miss my friend
and I love what she has given me

wisdom, laughter, and companionship
enough to fill the sweeping voids of her present self
searching for their permanent place
Stories vaulted to a secret place of which I have the only ingress
and always a passion for what is present
memories shared in celestial bliss
the full spectrum of senses
compassion, poignancy, courage and perseverance to face life's trials


My friend,

with the fortitude of a lifelong competitor, striving to conquer the next challenge...even if it is, unfamiliar territory

Cloud Cover

When our vision is clouded, we must remove ourselves from thought,

before we can grow in perspective

The Graceful Graduate

I've been avoiding this

Procrastinating

Actually refusing to acknowledge

Living in an incomplete picture

Breaking the brush that started the drawing

You see

this was one landscape I was never really intended to complete

something I started and was an integral part of at it's inception

and as the years passed, I became less

Less the designer

Less the artist

Less the lead in the pencil and more the rough draft

Less necessary

This was one work of art that grew on it's own

Took on it's own identity and blossomed into it's own original piece

vibrant, dynamic, intense and soothing

Alive with depth

Alluring, energetic, broad

A portrait I started but life took over

and delivered an adult

that resembles me in appearance

but surpasses me in life

A daughter that found herself amidst the rubble of my mistakes

and created a statue of standing

Solid

Unique

and Grounded in Grace

Finding Faith and Taking Flight

Faith grows where darkness covers

blue despair that blindly hovers

Lending light to the black hollow

giving promise to the slated sorrow

Lifting spirits from grey to white

until we find our guiding light

Finding Heart

If my pencil pierces your heart

 then I was dutifully lead to purpose

if it has merely brushed the surface

 then I must find a sharper tool

Trust Where I Lead

Remnants are small pieces of something larger
There is nothing one can do to collect these scraps and reproduce what was once there in full scale

This, a reality I grapple with each day

Beneath the flab of my forearms is a swimmers stroke

Weakened with age but having traversed extensive miles,
 I'm well traveled and ready to conquer the strongest current life throws
Among the perimeter of my thighs is the power of a once steadfast runner

Who could plod through a course with the dedication of a soldier,
slower than most but ready to stay the course

Buried amidst the rolls and creases of my midsection is the core of who I have always been
A person indulgent in excess but always ready to absorb the slights directed at others

Embroiled in my brain is a complex path that's fighting to pave the way
Within the grasp of my hands is the guidance I offer anyone willing to take hold and
Trust where I lead

Shot Gun

The Words
As quickly as they escape
Shot down in mid air
Blasted away
Serving as target practice for the hunter
Shattered and stunned



The Victim
Learns to disseminate sparingly
Traveling softly
Quietly
Almost non-existent
So as not to awaken the hunter
But the shot gun has already taken a life